You'll huv hud yer tea?

 According to everyone in Scotland, if you turn up at someone's house in Edinburgh they'll invite you in, sit you down, and state the rhetorical question "you'll have had your tea" - meaning, they won't offer you any.
By contrast, if you rock up on the doorstep of a Glaswegian they'll invite you in, sit you down, and ask what you would like to drink.

View up at Edinburgh castle from street level.
We got perfect weather on this particular day,
and clouds with icy wind thereafter...

While I didn't put this theory to the test, I did notice that compared to the general public in England, the people on the streets of Edinburgh were very friendly, so I have no idea what they're all so miffed about. A skeptic pointed out to me that this could have been because all the people on the streets of Edinburgh are tourists, and upon reflection he was probably dead on. But, friendly locals or not, the whole place had a pleasant low-key sort of frenzied feel to it, as though everyone was in a rush and on their way somewhere, but not overly stressed about actually getting there on a deadline.
I really enjoyed it.



The reason I went was to have a mini-reunion with some girls I had met while in New Zealand, and it was fantastic. It was great to see some familiar faces and pretend we were back on tour and didn't have jobs (or job-hunting, for me) hanging over us. We were free to behave like complete idiots for three nights, and we did.

View of Edinburgh Castle while walking up to it.

Edinburgh is quite a beautiful, clean and exciting specimen of a capital city, with lots of side streets and alleys littered with little cafes offering a cooked lunch and home-made cakes, and bursting at the seams with freezing patrons holding steaming cups of tea. Once the sun has gone down, the pubs and restaurants fill to overflowing, and live music drifts up at you from stairways leading to bars where people with good knees and bad are dancing the night away, cider in hand.



The city is fairly easy to navigate around once you've realised that simply standing on the Royal Mile and siting where you want to end up, then walking in that direction, is not a reliable navigation solution. The Royal Mile is the highest street in the city so far as I could tell, which means you can see exactly where you want to be...while you're on it.  As soon as you start walking down that side street the place you're pursuing becomes as elusive as your earplugs at 3am in a youth hostel. The streets slope downwards, and there's no obvious point when it happens either - you just suddenly become aware, as you're taking in the shops and sights, that you no longer know what direction you're going in, you're not sure at what point your destination slipped out of view behind the hundreds of other buildings, and to find out you can either continue down the hill in the hopes of finding a map - or walk back up it to find a view. Drat, not again!

Our little gang in front of Holyrood Palace;
from left: Nicola, Sarah, Rachel and myself.

During our brief stay we traipsed up and down the Royal Mile, first going to Holyroodhouse Palace and garden, which was beautiful. Holyrood Palace is the official residence of the Monarch of the United Kingdom in Scotland, and it chills (quite impressively) in the shadow of Arthur's Seat - a seriously decent sized hill with views across the whole of Edinburgh for miles and miles. The Palace has served as a residence for Scottish Kings and Queens since the 16th century and is also used for state occasions and official entertaining, and it's not hard to see why. It is absolutely gorgeous inside. When you walk in pretty soon you go up a staircase, and the plaster ceiling above it is breathtaking - it was sculpted on a wire mesh frame and features angels in the four corners, reaching down to you, as well as bunches of fruit and animals as well - it is impressively 3 dimensional for a plaster ceiling, it's such a shame you're not allowed to take any photos in the Palace.  The Abbey next to it - Holyrood Abbey - was founded in 1128 by David I, King of Scots. It is now ruins, but still very beautiful.


We took in the interesting architecture of the Scottish Parliament, where some very curious design choices

The little chapel.

have been made; then continued up the road back to the Royal Mile to do a tour of Edinburgh Castle. Wow, what a place! The tour was fascinating, and 

the castle itself is really cool, made so mainly by the history surrounding it. Edinburgh castle is the only one never to have been breached by force, and given that it sits at the stop of a cliff meaning serious business, it's not hard to see why. Up the top is a tiny little church, which our tour guide said was a bloke's idea of the perfect place for a wedding ceremony, as you can only cram about 28 people inside it, or 12 if the bride wants an isle to walk down...

The Scottish Crown Jewels at Edinburgh Castle
 (no photos allowed, but Google solves that problem). 

At the castle, we also saw the Scottish crown jewels, and the Stone of Destiny. The jewels were stunning (much prettier than the stone), but the history behind the stone is fascinating and slightly amusing from an outsider's perspective so I'll share a little.

The Stone of Destiny at Edinburgh Castle
 (again, thank you Google).

The Stone of Destiny is also known as the Stone of Scone (pronounced 'scoon'), and also as the Coronation Stone. There is so much history attached to it I won't even try to cover it all, and there are so many versions of what happened, but my understanding of it was basically this; while it was at Scone Palace in Scotland, Monarchs would come and be sat on it for their coronation, having brought soil from their home land in their boots (it was too impractical for the King to go to everybody's homeland so they brought their land to him basically - there is now a mound where all the dirt and soil built up). The stone was borrowed (read stolen) at some point by the English and placed in a throne, then 'returned' (stolen back) about 500 years later. Can you imagine? Ha! The library would not be impressed. 

Next on the agenda was a tour of the Edinburgh Dungeons, which I would recommend to anyone even thinking of going to Edinburgh; it was sensational. The way it is presented with facts and humour by actors playing a part is just fantastic, and it's a very creative way of getting the history across. Our little gang must have had "Volunteer" stenciled on our foreheads as we hadn't even made it past the first room (being the courtroom) when our little gang was put on trial for 'Crimes of fashion,' with the punishment being 'stripped nekkid, covered in super glue, then dragged through Marcs & Spencers.'  

Further through the dungeons, once we'd finished crying with laughter, I apparently gave some poor young actor a heart attack when he yelled at us for effect during a tense moment; "Calm down! Everybody just CALM DOWN!" mere inches from my face. So, naturally, I shouted right back.

Several rooms later my neon 'volunteer' sign lit up again it seems, as I was accused of being a traitor and was  dragged up on 'stage' to be drawn and quartered. I explained that I was Australian but the actor wanted revenge, demanded a scream, and specified blood-curdling. Come on, what would you have done? I deafened the guy.  For which I was then beheaded. Happily though, he missed, and so I was be-eared instead, much to the horror of some poor child in the front row on whom the ear landed.  

It was brilliant. I will say though, if you're not a fan of the Haunted House concept, or have little kiddies, I'd put it on the back burner. There was one woman in there who was actually shaking with genuine fear, to say nothing of the poor little tackers she'd brought with her - they may never sleep again. Whatever happened to doing your research? She probably took them to see Django for goodness sake...

But let's move on shall we? We also treated ourselves to the 'Scotch Whiskey Experience' which was very interesting and informative, quite strong - at a minimum of 40%, and a great help in my decision on whether or not to become a Cooper. Having watched a video on it, if I ever meet one I shall be very impressed, and if I ever become one I shall be very sore.

The National Monument at Calton Hill.

One of the girls and I made it up Calton Hill, which had a view almost as terrific as the wind - you needed a lead weight just to stay on the ground - even my heavy camera bag blew around if I put it down! But it was worth it. Calton Hill is home to the National Monument, the Nelson Monument, the Dugald Stewart Monument, the Old Royal High School, the Robert Burns Monument, the Political Martyrs' Monument and the Observatory. How does it all fit? It's a big hill.

We spent our evenings in a vast array of pubs, restaurants and bars and managed to narrowly avoid finding out what dead-I-mean-deep-fried pizza would taste like for dinner. For those who are wondering, no I did not try a deep-fried mars bar, because of all the deep-fried options available, that wasn't one of them. Go figure.

Bye for now!